Liiche (to TRITHAL): "It's good to see you again, Macha-Rei!"
AXEM and CHRIS (a'la Chris from Family Guy): "euWHAA??"
TRITHAL: "...I wish I could say the same, Macha-Kun, but you're mistaken. Macha-Rei has been dead for three years."
Liiche: "Is that so? Last I heard you had assimilated a young girl and disappeared to the south, but that was almost 20 years ago after the incident in Kureganu. Three years ago an informant told me that the girl you assimilated had died, and the guy she was living with vanished right afterward. Since then no one has heard anything. Are you still so ashamed that you refuse to show your true face to your brethren?"
TRITHAL: "What happened in Kureganu was unfortunate. However, at that time I was just a young child. I had nothing at all to do with it, so there's nothing for me to be ashamed of."
Disgusted at TRITHAL's impudence, Liiche engages him in a brief sword fight. AXEM and CHRIS aren't sure what to make of the stuff Liiche and TRITHAL are talking about. After the brief sword fight, Liiche said, "I see. So the assimilation is incomplete. You intend to die at the end of this person's natural life. But why should we fight each other? Why not join me in my crusade? Or, have you sworn allegiance with Midus?"
TRITHAL: "I owe no allegiance to Midus or any other prefect.... Nor do I owe any allegiance to the macha. I live of my own free will; therefore I fight of my own free will. And I will take this opportunity to atone for my sins at Kureganu by stopping you from killing any more innocent people!"
Liiche: "Prepare for your untimely demise! Ice Demons, ATTACK!"
BATTLE MODE ON
TRITHAL (31/31 HP; 22/22 SP; 220/3000 EXP)
AXEM (33/33 HP; 30/30 SP; 227/3000 EXP)
CHRIS (27/27 HP; 36/36 SP; 180/3000 EXP)
Ali (20/20 HP; 10/10 SP; 161 EXP)
Four Ice Demons face our party.
Ice Demon #1 uses his Ice Rod to attack TRITHAL. He loses 4 HP
Ice Demon #2 does the same move on AXEM. He loses 3 HP.
Ice Demon #3 repeats the previous move on Ali. She loses 5 HP.
Ice Demon #4 senses CHRIS' weakness against the element of water because of usurping of THRAX' Hell Fire and uses magic attack called ICE RING. Ice Demon #4's Ice Rod emits many large ice rings and encloses on CHRIS. He loses 11 HP.
Liiche: "You sorry pathetic excuses for RPG protagonists suck! You suck! You suck!"
AXEM is up next for an attack and uses a weapon he bought from a weapons shop in an earlier town and copies a move he seen from MORTAL KOMBAT ANNIHILATION and throws a spike ball which shoots out several spikes at the opponents. Each Ice Demon loses 20/50 HP.
While continuing this ripping-off motif, TRITHAL blatantly ripps off a signature move from one of the more-popular anime serieses and transforms his katana to a larger blade and uses the ice demons' demonic energy against them by redirecting their demonic wind back toward them, thus asserting his title as "The Divine Wind". Each Ice Demon loses 20/30 HP.
CHRIS makes a stupid chuckle and decides he wants to copy a move from a type of media he idolizes/worships so he stupidly uses his wizard stick to cast a spell which temporarily transforms his body into a duplicate version of Weird Al's fake-looking Rambo body suit from UHF during George's daydreaming sequence in said movie.....
.....
...
...
After CHRIS stands there with the same look Weird Al has on his face for a second or two, he shrinks back down to regular skinny-ass CHRIS. This form of confusion caused the ice demons to lose 2/10 HP each. Turns out that this spell was a complete and utter waste of the 17 SP he used.
AXEM: "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!!?!?!"
CHRIS: "Well, if you two are gonna copy moves from things we've seen then I should be able to, also!"
TRITHAL: "Yeah, if the move is actually likely to do some damage. Now your SP is nearly half gone!"
Ali uses her dueling sword and slashes an Ice demon. Ice Demon loses 10/8 HP and the Ice demon is destroyed.
Ice Demon #1 attacks TRITHAL with it's Ice Rod the same way before. TRITHAL loses 4 HP.
Ice Demon #2 attacks AXEM with the same move. AXEM loses 3 HP.
Ice Demon #3 attacks CHRIS with the same move. CHRIS loses 7 HP.
AXEM decides he wants to copy a move he has seen from an older episode of POWER RANGERS. Unfortunately, he wastes his turn because the move he copied came from a specific scene where that power ranger was doing alotta fancy footwork and arm movement. No attack was made.
TRITHAL attempts to copy a move from yet another anime and lunges a spear at an Ice demon...unfortunately the giant bean burrito he ate earlier has finished fermenting in his colon and he lets out a huge gut-wrenching, nose-hair curling fart and the spear move falls flat, wasting a turn with that nonsense.
CHRIS: "Goddamn! Someone light a match!"
CHRIS attempts to do something useful and simply whacks an Ice demon with his Wizard stick. Amazingly because the Wizard stick is substantially powerful no matter whose hands are holding it, he causes 8/8 HP damage. Ice Demon is destroyed.
Ali feels the whole team is riddled with faults and imperfections so she foregoes making an attack and simply casts a healing spell on her teammates that restores everybody's health to MAX. Ali loses 3 SP.
Liiche: "You are all an insult to the genre of RPG's! Expect for Ali, you are all pieces of shit! Macha-Rei even smells of it!"
Just then AXEM and TRITHAL coordinate a dual attack where the two lunge each other forward and each slash the remaining 2 ice demons with their respective weapons and both ice demons are destroyed.
Party gains 76 EXP.
TRITHAL (31/31 HP; 22/22 SP; 296/3000 EXP)
AXEM (33/33 HP; 30/30 SP; 303/3000 EXP)
CHRIS (27/27 HP; 19/36 SP; 256/3000 EXP)
Ali (20/20 HP; 7/10 SP; 237 EXP)
TRITHAL gains a level
HP: 31>33
SP: 22>24
AXEM gains a level
HP: 33>35
SP: 30>32
CHRIS gains a level
HP: 27>29
SP: 36>38
Ali gains a level
HP: 20>22
SP: 10>12
TRITHAL (31/33 HP; 22/24 SP; 296/3000 EXP)
AXEM (33/35 HP; 30/32 SP; 303/3000 EXP)
CHRIS (27/29 HP; 19/38 SP; 256/3000 EXP)
Ali (20/22 HP; 7/12 SP; 237 EXP)
Our party faces another foursome of Ice Demons
After TRITHAL pauses the battle to explain to CHRIS why FL-CL is right up his alley, and CHRIS wastes 15 SP to portray Arnold Schwarzenegger doing something silly in a scene from LAST ACTION HERO and AXEM does some melodramatic "mean-mugging" he copies from Lui Kang in MORTAL KOMBAT, Ali once again gets our less-than-able party through the battle with everyone gaining another 76 EXP and another level.
TRITHAL (27/35 HP; 12/26 SP; 372/3000 EXP)
AXEM (29/37 HP; 12/34 SP; 379/3000 EXP)
CHRIS (20/31 HP; 4/40 SP; 332/3000 EXP)
Ali (17/24 HP; 4/14 SP; 313 EXP)
Liiche: "You all are a joke! You have managed to defeat all of my Ice demons, now face the wrath of Liiche of the Cold, ruler of Mount Sabretooth!!
Liiche has the highest agility so he attacks first. Liiche turns to TRITHAL and attacks him with a single overhead mashing fist move. TRITHAL, whose digestive system is still in distress, is unable to move fast enough to avoid being hit. At the same time he lets out another dead-raising fart and loses 10 HP from that attack.
After spraying down the area with odor destroyer, AXEM decides he is gonna copy a magic attack from a video game this time and implements EARTH CRUSHER. A jagged piece of rock juts out of the ground. Liiche loses 10/100 HP. AXEM loses 5 SP for that move.
TRITHAL decides to play it smart and conserve his SP, using his katana blade and slashes at Liiche. Liiche loses 3/90 HP.
As CHRIS readies himself to waste his final 4 SP on something "just to be silly", AXEM and TRITHAL shake their heads "no". Dissapointed he instead whacks Liiche with his Wizard's stick. Liiche loses 1 HP.
Ali: "Curse you, Liiche! Your stats are too high for us!"
Liiche: "Surrender King Midus' throne and I'll spare your lives and his own!"
TRITHAL says, in an ever-so stereo-typical hero response to an enemy who threatens victory in some cheezy epic: "NEVER!"
The battle wears on...
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